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Christmas cracker jokes for kids - Xmas Cracker Jokes

Posted By sanjay_soni007 on Dec 12, 2009   FROM: woodlands-junior.kent.sch.uk report abuse

Christmas Crackers Jocks - Xmas Cracker Jokes fr Kids

Christmas is a most popular holiday celebrated on December 25th every year in the worldwide. Christmas festival is celebrated differently in different parts in the world. This festival celebrates the birth of god Jesus. The best way to celebrate the festival may be to go on a vacation because this is prefect time to let loose all the tensions and forget about the drudgeries of everyday life.

Christmas cracker jokes for kids - Xmas Cracker Jokes

Here are given best Christmas Cracker Jokes collection for kids. This is some of the best and exclusive jocks; you can send this beautiful Crackers Jocks to your family and friends on this holiday. Enjoy this funny and amazing Christmas Crackers Jocks.

Christmas Crackers Jocks:

1. Q: Why shouldn't you play Scrabble in a wind-tunnel?
 A: Because someone could lose an "I".

2. Q: What do you call it when a bunch of sheep roll down a hill?
 A: A lamb slide.

3. Why couldn't the Christmas tree stand up?
  - A Christmas tree does not have legs like we do!

4. Customer: Waiter! Waiter! What's wrong with this fish?
  - Waiter: Long time, no sea

5. Q: Did you hear about the stupid plastic surgeon?
A:Yes. He stood in front of the fire and melted!

6. Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the toilet too long?
A: Polaroids.

7. What does Santa do with fat elves?
  - He sends them to an Elf Farm!

8. Q: What's worse than Rudolph with a runny nose?
 A: Frosty the snowman with a hot flush!

9. What do you get from a pampered cow?
  - Spoiled milk.

10. Q: Why should husbands make the early morning tea for their wives?
 A: Because the Bible says He Brews

11. Q: Why do ghosts live in the fridge?
A: Because it's cool!

12. Q: What's purple and shouts "Help"?
 A: A damson in distress.

13. Q: What would you do if a rhino charged you?
 A: Pay him!

14. Q: What do sheep say to shepherds at Christmastime?
A: Season's Bleating!

15. Q: Patient: Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pack of cards.
A: Doctor: I'll deal with you later.

16. Q: Why are chocolate buttons rude?
A: Because they are Smarties in the nude.

17. Q: Why did the man get the sack from the orange juice factory?
A: Because he couldn't concentrate.

18. Q: How do witches tell the time?
A: With a witch-watch!

19. Q: What’s red, white and blue at Christmas time?
A: A sad candy cane!

20. Q: What's the best thing to give your parents for Christmas?
A: A list of everything you want!

21.Q: What's brown and sneaks round the kitchen?
A: Mince spies!

22. Q: Why do birds fly south in winter?
A: Because it is too far to walk

23.Q: Why do so many spiders work in IT?
A: Because they are great at web design.

24.Q: What do you call a psychologist covered in clingfilm?
A: Shrinkwrapped.

25. Q:How do you make an idiot laugh on Boxing Day?
A: Tell him a joke on Christmas Eve

26.Q: What do you call Santa's little helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses!

27.Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: Because it was the chicken's day off!

28.Q: "Do you ever buy any Christmas Seals?"
A: "No, I wouldn't know how to feed them."

30.Q: What's the best thing to give your parents for Christmas?
A: A list of everything you want!

31.Q: What do wild animals sing at Christmastime?
A: Jungle bells, jungle bells, jungle all the way!

32.Q: What do you call a woman who stands between two goal posts?
A: Annette.

33.Q: Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A: A mince spy!

34.Q: What's a child's favourite king at Christmas?
A stocKING !!

35.Q: What king is the children's favorite at Christmas time?
A: A stocking!

36.Q: What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when the fire is lit?
A: Crisp Cringle!

37. Q: Son: Dad, there's a man collecting for a new swimming pool.
A: Dad: Well give him a glass of water!

38. Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.

39. Q: What's black white and red all over?
A. Santa in chimney soot

40. Santa went to the Doctors with a problem.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Santa: I seem to have a mince pie stuck up my bottom!
Doctor: Well your in luck because I've got just the cream for that!

Source: www.woodlands-junior.kent.sch.uk

 

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